To the 25% of Americans Who Want to Secede: See Ya, Wouldn’t Wanna Be Ya!
“Let’s just let them all go. Give them the territory they would have had under the confederacy. Let’s see them create a thriving economy, and have an adequate armed forces to secure their borders. Let’s see how they fair without the billions of dollars in federal funds that red states get every year to make up for their governors’ decisions to decimate their tax base. A confederacy at this point would be rife with so much comedic fodder, I’m half tempted to move to a red state just to help foment the outrage necessary to get it on board with leaving.”